#32: Don't Quit. Ask Better Questions

But how Maurice?

“I don’t want to invest. I don’t necessarily want to travel the world. My job pays the bills. I just wish I had more control over my day-to-day life design so I could live better. My main issue is I never have time for life, for outside passions or even family. I’m burned out.”

What would you do, Maurice?

.....

Many of you can relate to this frustration. In fact, it resulted in what was called “The Great Resignation” (in the United States) starting 2021.

People wanted different working arrangements and/or better pay. Essentially people were quitting work in droves because they were burned out. It peaked between November 2021 and April 2022 when almost 4.5 million people quit per month on average. That’s a lot of frustrated people.

I wanted more out of life too when I was an employee. So, I came up with creative ways to make it happen rather than default quitting.

ASK BETTER QUESTIONS.

PRESENT SOLUTIONS TO SUPPORT, NOT PROBLEMS TO SOLVE.

Because quitting is one tool, asking better questions is another.

Look at it this way...

Hey HR - I need different work arrangements to have more time for self and family. How do I do that?

In this scenario, you've created a problem HR now has to solve.

Flip it!

Instead of creating a problem for your boss, present solutions that are so good, they have to support them. That is a Try Life On principle:

Present solutions to support, not problems to solve.

This is a form of what I call, "Asking Better Questions."

Many want a primary career PLUS outside passions like building a business or simply better work arrangements resulting in more time for self.

For me, one example was being a corporate executive (high salary) and a police officer (childhood dream) at the same time. I wanted to keep the high salary to invest in real estate and work on financial freedom. I also genuinely liked my corporate career and the skills and experiences I was receiving from it, but I thought about leaving all the time because I wanted to be a police officer.

Instead of quitting, and instead of asking my company how I could do both, I constructed a solution they couldn’t refuse (to get secondary employment approved).

“I’ll be working nights, be seen as a pillar of the community, present to employee resource groups how outside interests are encouraged, etc.”

“I’ll be building real-world expertise for our worldwide policing clients that we can use to create revenue.”

The last phrase is key.

It made the idea beneficial TO THE BOTTOM LINE. It was a solution they could support. They really didn’t have to think about it a lot.

It worked. Midnight patrol officer for 15 years (my dream) and didn’t have to give up my corporate salary to do it. How’s that for a designed life?

I used that skill to do company work at 19 national police forces worldwide – Spain, Finland, France, Ireland, Nigeria, and many more. We kept winning work with clients, in part, because of my credibility as a badge holder (a brother in the game). My outside passion supported my company’s goals.

There were other examples too.

I started my 25-year career in IT consulting at 21 in 1997 but had other REAL aspirations… so I started asking better questions to get them. I created solutions for them to support and received good outcomes. Here’s a summary:

2004 – I’m going to grad school to play football again and give the NFL another shot. How can you support me? (A: You can work part-time, 20 hours a week, while you go).

2008 – I’d like to be a police officer in my local community and am going to give up 80% salary to do so. It's a calling. How can you support me? (A: Don’t quit. Let’s find a way to do both (did so for 15 years)).



2012 – I love international affairs and culture immersion for work. Speaks to my soul. How can you support me? (A: We’ll create a new role for you… worked 7 years virtually and physically in 12 countries).

2015 - I'd like to volunteer for 2 years in my Federal Agent military role to run field offices in Turkey and Africa. I'm concerned about my civilian career. How can you support me? (A: Don't be. You'll be an even better human when you return. Your salary will be taken care of).

2021 – A happily retired employee who ignored higher paychecks and offers to leave and worked his butt off for 25 years because I was heard. I asked better questions. Turned down 7+ offers to leave for more money along the way.

Get my point?

Quitting is an option. But if an employer helps design life, place massive $$ value on it.

But you have to help them help you. Ask a better question to make it easy for them. Present solutions to support, not problems to solve.

Need a better understanding? I got you.

This 5 min audio explanation will help you. Listen to it here. I explained in a conversation how I used these concepts to get my employer to support me.

It's from Try Life On Podcast Episode 70 – From Manilla With Love: The Ultimate Try Life On Conversation, if you'd like to hear this and other concepts that will help you Try Life On more.

Take it from a happy entrepreneur who enjoyed 25 years of corporate work...

...but also found ways to be a Federal Agent, Police Officer, Restaurant and Club Owner, and do things like travel to the country of Turkey 35 times to volunteer in refugee camps for months at a time and, my favorite, leave Maryland on Thursday evenings, for example, to read books by the Aegean Sea, to then return to work on Monday.

How?

Asked lots of questions and presented solutions my employer couldn't say no to. Was unwilling to have a status quo life.

Found ways to Try Life On. You can too.

When there's something you want to do to live life your way, present irresistible solutions to be supported, not problems for someone to solve.

Good luck!

Maurice